Mom Accused of Being 'Too Harsh' for Making Daughter Pay Back $1K Bridesmaid Dress She Refuses to Wear Because It's 'Ugly'

Mar. 15, 2025

A bride and her bridesmaids (stock image).Photo:Getty

Getty

A mom is facing criticism from fellow family members for making her teen daughter pay her back for the expensive bridesmaid dress she refuses to wear.

Ina poston Reddit’s “Am I the A——?” forum, the mom explained that her eldest daughter is getting married and had not planned to include her younger sister Emma in her bridal party. However, 16-year-old Emma was “excited” and really wanted to be involved, so she pressed her older sister to let her serve as a bridesmaid.

“My oldest agreed to include her, even though it meant extra costs and adjustments,” the mom wrote.

Emma’s family agreed to pay for the teen’s $1,000 dress because she “did not have that cash.” However, with the wedding just one month away, Emma has suddenly changed her mind about being a bridesmaid.

As for her reasons, the mom explained that Emma is “refusing to wear the dress since she thinks it is ugly and unflattering on her.” Emma also feels “uncomfortable” about the role and pointed out that she isn’t close with the other bridesmaids.

“I reminded her that she had been the one pushing to be a part of the wedding, but she was firm and backed out,” the mom continued.

A bride with her wedding guests (stock image).Getty Images

Getty Images

“Emma is upset and says it’s unfair, claiming we’re punishing her for not wanting to do something she wasn’t comfortable with anymore,” the mom wrote, adding that other family members have told her she is being “too harsh” with her daughter.

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“She’s not being punished, she is just having to face the real-world consequences of changing her mind,” one person wrote.

Another commented: “This is a valuable lesson to learn. $1,000 seems like a lot for a teenager, but she’ll be much more careful with her future commitments.”

Others pointed out that Emma had plenty of time to bring up her concerns about the dress and her bridesmaid role before the money was spent. “Emma pushed to be in the wedding. If she changed her mind because she hated the dress, she should’ve said that when she first tried it on and definitely prior to it being paid for since it’s non-refundable,” one person wrote.

“You can try to sell it to make some of the money back and have Emma pay the difference, but I don’t think you’re being extremely harsh or cruel,” they added. “The loss of $1,000 is a result of a series of choices Emma made.”

A bridesmaid getting ready (stock image).Getty

Someone else agreed, writing, “She had a LOOOOONG time to voice these concerns back when something could actually be done. This is just a lesson of cause and effect for her.”

Still, a small minority of people took a less-sympathetic stance and blamed the mom for letting Emma push her older sister to make room for her in her bridal party.

“You should have told her ‘no’ in the first place. Who cares if she ‘wanted’ to be in the wedding? It was the bride’s choice and obviously she didn’t want her sister in the wedding party or she would have asked her first,” they argued. “You made the bride add her, you allowed a child to make a decision — this is onyou. Maybe make her pay half, but it’s crazy to make her pay the whole $1,000 when you as the parent should have shut this down in the first place.”

“Shoulda shut it down from the start or have her paid to show if she really wanted to be in [the wedding],” another person chimed in. “It’s now an expensive lesson for you.”

source: people.com