Sterling K. Brown Sometimes Asks 'What Would Randall Do' to Keep Ryan Michelle Bathé Happy in Their Marriage (Exclusive)

Mar. 15, 2025

Ryan Michelle Bathe and Sterling K. Brown.Photo:Arnold Turner/Getty

Arnold Turner/Getty

Sterling K. BrownandRyan Michelle Bathémay look like they have a perfect marriage, but even they know getting there takes work — and a little help from Randall Pearson!

As the couple gears up to launch their new podcast,We Don’t Always Agree, they tell PEOPLE about the secret to their 17-year marriage and why they sometimes find themselves leaning into Brown’sThis Is Uscharacter to keep things sailing ahead.

When asked if he ever feels pressure to uphold the “perfect husband” image that Randall embodied onThis Is Us, the actor, 48, tells PEOPLE: “Not really. Randall’s way better than me. Even my wife would say sometimes, if I was trying to watch basketball or what have you, she’s like, ‘I need you to do something.’ And I’m like, ‘Okay. But my attention’s split.’ "

Adds Bathé, 48: “We talk about that in podcast: WWRD, what would Randall do? … I wanted help with the Christmas tree. I said, ‘Excuse me, Sterling, can I get Randall please?’ "

Sterling K. Brown (left) and Susan Kelechi Watson as Randall and Beth Pearson on ‘This Is Us’.Ron Batzdorff/NBC

Even though he’s often associated with his beloved character from the NBC hit, Brown says he tries to stay true to himself — both in his marriage, and beyond.

Brown will tackle that topic and much more on his and Bathé’s podcast, which launches on Wednesday, Sept. 25. The couple will be discussing everything from relationships, parenting and spirituality to ayahuasca, therapy, race, health, and navigating fame.

“My question to myself was: how do people who don’t agree about a range of topics, how do they find common ground? And that’s kind of what started it,” says Bathé, noting that it feels as though “nobody can find common ground” these days.

“I thought, well, in our house, we obviously have the same goals, but we have a lot of different ideas about how to get there. So maybe if we used ourselves as a little tiny microcosm of how two people who don’t agree but have the same love for their family, each other, where they’re going… maybe that’s where we start,” theEndgameandFirst Wives Clubactress adds. “Sterling and I really don’t always agree on a number of things, but we stand in agreement about where we are going and what we want out of life.”

Sterling K. Brown and Ryan Michelle Bathe’s new podcast.

As a married couple, Brown says working together comes with its own set of challenges.

“I have this weird feeling of like, ‘Well, if it doesn’t go right, if it goes wrong and we have a problem, then we have to take that problem home,’ " the Oscar nominee jokes. “I felt like the podcast was a nice microcosm of seeing, can we do it? Will we have beef? Will it be something that lingers into the relationship or not?”

“I’m happy to say we’re still married, we’re still going! We did okay,” he laughs, before adding, “I also think it’s really nice to see a couple, a African-American, Black couple, husband and wife, who are doing well in this industry, talk through what it takes in order for their marriage to work. I would say it’s one of the motivating factors for Ryan and I to put our story on record.”

But the pair also acknowledge they’re not perfect. In fact, Brown and Bathé weathered several challenges before getting married — including multiple breakups — and those past difficulties will be explored on their podcast.

“We’re doing the podcast so that we can, not necessarily help others because that’s so grandiose because I don’t know what kind of help [we can provide], but it is an offering,” Bathé explains. “A lot of people have questions about us and to us, there are things that we’re figuring out and we always find that what’s more interesting is what we’re figuring out rather than what we already have nailed down. So we wanted to show people what it looks like [and emphasize] that life is about figuring it out.”

Adds Sterling: “If you want to call us goals, it’s not because we got all the answers, but it’s because we are committed to trying to contemplate the questions as deeply as possible together.”

Ryan Michelle Bathe and Sterling K. Brown attend the 2nd Annual Academy Museum Gala.Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic

The two certainly have figured out quite a lot, including the secret sauce to their 17-year marriage.

“I think we try not to go longer than three weeks without seeing each other. So if I’m on location and she’s on location, somebody’s going to come home or somebody’s going to go visit,” Brown says.

“It used to be a six-week rule and I can tell all the newlyweds, too long. Six weeks is too long,” he continues. “I’m also liking this thing that’s going on Instagram right now. I like the six-second kiss. We don’t do it every day. But we try to do it a little bit more often because you get that serotonin flowing from one person to the other. It’s easy to, especially when kids get involved, it’s very easy to pour all of your energy, time, love, consideration into them and neglect your partner. And so you have to be very conscientious and intentional with regards to that.”

Ultimately, the two hope to find common ground with their listeners, shine a light on issues that often don’t get discussed and reassure people to be kinder to themselves.

“I want people to walk away with [a message of], it’s okay not to be okay,” says Bathé. “Be complete with your incompletion. We are perfectly imperfect. In truth, what I hope is that we offer and show and model grace in the face of your humanness, your foibles, because you’re going to have them… but can you give yourself grace?”

Never miss a story — sign up forPEOPLE’s free daily newsletterto stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer​​, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.

We Don’t Always Agreeis available to listen on Brown and Bathe’sYouTube channelas well as all podcast platforms. New episodes drop every Wednesday.

source: people.com