A mom enjoying her first-ever trip to the grocery store with her daughter got a taste of the mom-shaming that concerns so many.
“I was filming myself for my vlog on my first full weekend solo parenting while my husband was out of town. I was just documenting the day, and I took my daughter to grocery store. It was actually her first time ever being at a grocery store and sitting in the cart,” Nicole tells PEOPLE.
The new mom was getting a kick out of watching her little girl take in everything she was seeing and experiencing.
“Occasionally people would come up and say nice things, like ‘Oh she’s so cute!’ or ‘How old?’ And this woman came up to me. And the first thing she said was, ‘Oh, you’re still in your jammies…’ "
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The moment, caught on video in the vlog, caught the new mom off guard.
“I don’t think she’s meant any harm, but it was just an odd way to start a conversation,” she says. “There are a lot of other ways to kind of interact with babies and then she also commented on her not smiling.”
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Nicole Webz/Tiktok
“My daughter doesn’t just give out smiles to me half the time, let alone strangers,” Nicole says. “I just thought that was also a peculiar. The fact that she was commenting on like her personality, or her emotions when she’s a literal stranger was weird. My daughter doesn’t owe her anything. It was just a very weird interaction all in all.”
“I was kind of shocked to see how many other moms could relate to that. It was also nice to see other people shocked and think there’s nothing wrong with my daughter being in pajamas at a grocery store,” Nicole says.
“Everyone was very supportive about how I wasn’t doing anything wrong and saying, ‘You’re a great mom. You should not feel guilty about how your daughter is dressed.’ So, I am glad in retrospect that I did post it. Not that I felt any sort of guilt, but it also just keeps me from feeling any sort of mom guilt, knowing that people were very supportive.”
Nicole was also disheartened to hear “how commonplace it is” for strangers to comment on moms' parenting in public.
“The fundamentals are, ‘If you don’t have anything nice to say, just keep it to yourself,’ especially when it comes to other people and their kids. I also found a lot of humor in the fact that adults women were commenting about still going to the grocery store in pajamas themselves.”
Nicole’s video went viral at the same time TikTok was abuzz with moms admitting their “17 diapers” experiences. She says the whole situation has opened her eyes about “how much anxiety moms already deal with.”
The new mom is hopeful that being open about her experience will help other moms who need it.
“I hope that other moms can find solace in the fact that we’re not alone in this. I do hope that society starts to change,” she says. “I hope that I am helping to build that community within my channel, so that other moms can feel relatable in some of those experiences that we’re currently feeling.”
source: people.com